The Nation's Oldest Mailman

MY LIFE IS OVER!!! Yes, it's true. The nation's oldest mail man did retire. I no longer will look forward to getting my mail delivered by some 95 year old man. I may never recover. That's all, but you all needed you know.

SQUARE WATERMELON!!!

Blogs Blogs Blogs

I found this other blog on mustaches! From the nineteenth century. I didn't actually read it, just looked at the pictures, but they were very nice photos, so I shall share it with you. If I find any other blogs of note I will share them with you. So here is the mustache one: http://mustachesofthenineteenthcentury.blogspot.com/ and while we're on the topic, here is my friend Alexa's blog that I stalk frequently. http://littlemusespeaks.blogspot.com/ That's all! But I promise I shall search the Internet high and low to give you more blogs!

Welcome to...

Yes I'm posting. Again. And I know most of you cannot keep up with the onslaught of posts, but I stalk my own blog to see if people comment, and then I get bored and make another post. So this time it is my country. It doesn't have a name, but it does have a flag!

But I can't show it to you. I'll work on that later! So for now I'll explain as much as I can. During Social Studies with our crazy preggo lawyer aspiring teacher trying to teach us, I would go on random rants. Sometimes I took on the persona of a dead slave fighting in the Civil War, but most times I brought up the subject of starting my own country. So it is the summer, and I have loads of free time, so I've decided to pursue my fantasy! I googled "How to start your won country" and found some surprising results. There are four main things that I need to complete to have my own country. I shall sing it for you now. (Points if you know what song/ show that is from!)

1)Acquire Land

2)Get a population

3)Create a functioning government

4)Interact like a real country with other countries

So really all I have to do is have some land, people, people in charge, and play nice with all the other countries and I'm good! But I've hit a roadblock in my awesome plan. I don't have a name for my country. So here's where you come in. Please?? I'll give you a list of all the names I have, and I would love if you could vote on your favorite, or suggest your own. Here they are!

Guska

Jordaf

Lupain

Talamh

Elic

Eland

Ugitra

Hentun

Yup! And I would also love if you would be part of my permanent population. That would make me happy. So vote! So any way, the government is a supreme overlord racy. I am the supreme overlord, and everyone else is the racy. But when I die you can vote for the next supreme overlord. So it's all good and not a dictatorship full of people with complete power. And I'm hoping to have a bunch of smart people helping me be nice to all the other countries. So that's all! Have an unrelated picture!

What's New With ME!!!

Well there are some things on my to-do list that I would think everyone wants to know, and I shall tell you when they happen. These are all my goals for the summer, or my life.

~Get to a 8 minute mile (Daunting, as of now I am at 10:19 Not good, I know)

~Make my own country (A dream of mine, ever since I brought it up one day during social studies)

~See Toy Story 3

~Watch A Very Potter Sequel

~Get enough cash to pay for field hockey camp

~Do that math worksheet...

~Try not to be as mean to people

~ Finish my musical with PJ

~Actually keep this blog going

~Get more people besides you to read this blog

I know you loved that! And I will inform you if I complete one of those thing

s, or give you up dates on the making my own country and making a musical things! That is all, I shall leave you with a picture of a deflated soccer ball.

It's Okay Please Remain Calm

At some point all of these posts are going to disappear. At that time you should remain calm and follow these rules. If you don't like rules, these are guidelines.

1) Stay Calm

2)Scroll all the way down. Hit button that says older posts. It will bring you to older posts.

3) If too worried to do that go to right hand side (sorry lefties) and look. There you will find the titles of older posts. Click on them. Read them. Have fun.

4) Find a T-Rex and feed him a goat.

Yes I know I mentioned goats, but I liked this picture.

Thank you and good day.

Commenting is GOOD!!!

Today I shall talk about commenting, and anything else that comes to mind. Let's take a field trip to dictionary.com to learn what they have to say about it. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/comments. Thank you dictionary.com, and let's all hope that it wasn't copyrited and that I can't get sued. So I'm slightly worried because no one is commenting. Knock knock, is anybody home? Are you alive out there? Am I the only living person left? Am I just doing this and no one is reading? Does the square root of pi even exist? Well show me that you're alive! Comment. Yes, it's a demand. You must comment of I will hunt you down and eat small cute puppies right in front of you. I went there. It doesn't even have to relate to the post. If I'm talking about sock monkeys you can start chatting about Newton's Law. I really just want to know that you are out there, and not dead. Because if you were dead that would make me sad. I'm too lazy to search the internet for a picture, so just make one up. I'm thinking dancing giraffe on roller blades.

Whatever Happened??

Hello World! I am quite bored and posting again! The topic shall be (dun dun dun) kids shows! Then and now! I have strong opinions on this topic, and this post may go one for a while. Some of my favorites from then are the following: Arthur, Barney, Blue's Clues, Cyberchase, Rugrats, Rocket Power, Chalk Zone. Those were my favorites. Good times, good times. Arthur was great, and still is. That crazy little aardvark taught me so many things, like how to calm a baby, that Mr. Ratburn is a puppeteer and doesn't cut off boy's heads, and there is a catchy jingle that helps you spell aardvark.

ARTHUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rocket Power was also awesome. Squid, Otto, Reggie, and Twister. Those crazy kids were always up to some sort of extreme sport in their homeland of Ocean Shores, California. If you want to know more, have a link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rocket_Power Personally my favorite episode was when Twister found a walrus on the beach, and the walrus followed him around for a few days. In the end Twister was getting annoyed and told the walrus that he had to go back to his homeland, in the ocean. It was a very emotional episode. We shall now shed light upon Blue's Clues. It was good, with an amazing cast. Blue, Steve, Sidetable drawer, Tickity Tock, The Felt Friends, Shovel, and Pail. They were so dynamic together! I remember when Paprika was born. It brings tears to my eyes. Another link for the people out there who only knew about Steve and Blue. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue%27s_Clues And let's get this straight, Steve is the only good host. Not Joe. Joe stinks. Don't fight it. Well that's as in depth I'm going with my favorite shows from the past so I can be mean to shows now, but have an array of links if you are intrigued.

Steve Is My Love!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barney_and_Friends

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyberchase

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rugrats

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chalk_Zone

Now to current kid shows. Where did they go wrong? The people who invented Recess, and Filmore! (no one ever knows about this one so be informed, click on the link!! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fillmore!) are now making Hannah Montana? The makers of Rugrats are now in charge of iCarly? What happened?!?!? REAL people? In the rare case that there are cartoons, why are they digitally made? I know we have the technology, but we don't need it! The hand drawn cartoons are what they world runs on! So I asked my resident 8 year old some questions.

iCarly is evil

Me: Out of the the following shows, which ones have you heard of? Arthur, Barney, Blue's Clues, Cyberchase, Rugrats, Rocket Power, Chalk Zone, Recess, and Filmore!.

Him: Chalk Zone, Filmore, Blue's Clues, Rugrats, Arthur, Cyberchase, Barney, and Recess. (How many of these would he have seen if I hadn't had the TV at 6:30 a.m. under my control, and he was forced to watch it.

Me: What is your favorite T.V. show?

Him: Phineas and Ferb.

Me: What is your favorite T.V channel?

Him: Disney.

Thank you eight year old. Well look at America's youth now. Hardly recognized awesome shows from my youth. Now I know that not everything is lost. I can still catch some shows really early in the morning. Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide is still going (only re-runs) and so is Drake and Josh (re-runs too). But as I'm trying to watch the so-so shows of my youth I'm plauged with music videos of bad pop, and annoying commercials for shows I don't care about. It does sadden me, and I'll be on the look out for good new shows. As of now I'm addicted to Monk (sleuth on Sunday mornings) and Pysch (Hulu-ed, is that a word?) Well that's all!

Legos and Being Rich

This is my brother Declan, take two. As he wasn't cooperating the first time. Declan is 8.

Today's topic is... LEGOS! Because they are awesome. I've made a boat, that has a baseball player on it. Legos are very painful when you step on them. It doesn't hurt as much when you step on cheese. I want to make a baseball park, but I don't have enough pieces. One day I want to be rich and famous. (Editor's note: what does that have to do with Legos?) I feel like making money out of legos. (Editor's note: Aha, problem solved) I'm also thinking of making a bank for the money. (I sense an obsession.) I will put my awesome yet cool face on the bills. (I have a better choice of words to describe his face, but I'll be nice) I wish I had a cell phone out of legos. Well that's the end of this part. Next time I'll talk about food! (I'm not sure there will be a next time...)

Curious, when I was 8 I remember hoping that I was allowed to play with my friends, not planning to put my face on money. How the times do change. Declan is reading this, and is probably offended. I can't seem to remember that he knows how to read now... Always a problem when I spell things that I want to do, that he can't.

Me: Hey mom, can I go to T-O-W-N?

Him: I know you just spelled town.

Me: Dang it.

Well that's all world. I'll see you in a few hours.

These hurt to step on.

Being Good To The Earth, As Told By A 4 Year Old

This is Ian:

Thank you. I love you so much because you love you so much because you are blue green and white. I love the world. You make me happy. I love you the most of your sensilation. Earth so I would want to be green so the trash don't end up in the land fill about 40,000 people have recycled and throw things out and do stuff to help the earth so our world is a better place to be like throwing out recyclable bottles and using reusable bottles. turn off a computer when you're not using it, turn off a light when you're not using it. And that can help make the world a better place.

That was Ian after I told him to say hi to the world. I meant people, but the little four year old took it literally. So cute. And yes, sensilation is not a real word, he made it up. Thank you Ian for doing everything as I just typed like a monkey.

Poor Little Decapitated Ginger Bread Woman

So I was at my friend's house, sleeping over. And in the morning when I, and many others, am in some dazed state where nothing I think makes sense I came across two interesting topics. Number 1: Circles and Ovals are the most likely shapes to start a school shooting, and Number 2: Little kids should be taught to count to twelve, not ten. So to number one, I was staring at some pool sticks that were leaned up on the wall and was tracing the shapes. Then I thought, what are those called? Parallelograms? Nope... Hmm. Monkeys? No, those are rain forest mammals. Polygons! That's it! What are the restraints of a polygon? Do all the sides have to be equal? Forget it, I'm not about to struggle with geometry this early. But I know for certain that circles are not a polygon, neither are ovals. Poor little rounded shapes, no one loves you. And no one enjoys finding your area, because they have to deal with pi! So circles are very bitter shapes, and would cause school shootings. Thank you thank you!

Yes I realize that the picture has nothing to do with anything, but I was looking for a frowning oval, and this distracted me...

Now for number two. When you're little you you learn to count to ten. But all our units of measurement are in twelve. So little kids should learn two more numbers. It won't kill them, I think. And our base number shouldn't be 100, or 10 10's, but 144, 12 12's. Yes I know you are amazed at how deep I can be, or how bored I made you, but I can promise that your I.Q. is very similar to what it was before.

I would like to thank Safari, the search engine. Without its awesome word spelt wrong finding super powers this post would have been a mess.

Conforming!

Okay well I am me, and this is my blog. What you are on is a computer. 1=1, but on rare occasions 1=2. Now you have everything you may ever need to know about life! So this is the BlogBlog, and I made it because I am conforming to my peers, who are also making blogs. And to spite my mother, who is against me having anything to do with the internet, but I'll save that for another time. I will torture you with meaningless arguments that I have with myself, occasionally deep topics, and rants I have on children's toys/ television shows. If you don't want that, leave. The exit is lit up with a big flashing red light, that conveniently says exit. Or if you are anywhere else besides the United States, it is a green running man. Or you could stay, I promise I won't make your I.Q. points drop *that* much.